Mall of Low Riders

  Today I am going to read you a story for the first time ever called Low Rider-The Legend. This story will involve with the 6 traits of writing and four guys trying to look for good stuff to buy while trapped in a mall.

    Once upon a time in a mall far away a gang of friends will be trapped in a mall with one thousand in cash money in their pockets for 5 days and if they can stand that long they will win 1 million low riders. Here are the names of the four idiots who will be trapped in a mall. The fattest kid in the world fat boy,the idiot Kelso,the big head Carlito, and craziest man in the world Vito.

    1st Day

     While trapped in a mall the gang tries to find Ideas and Content and let us take a look. Looking at clothes made the gang think of boring clothes. Now it is time for the cameras to look at the gang for now section which is Organization. While looking at clothes they noticed that they were organized from small to big.

    Lunch Break-While playing around in the mall Kelso got lost in the toy sections and Vito got kicked out of the mall for breaking things and yelling allot, so now that means Vito is banned from the mall and Kelso is out there crying like a baby.

   Voice+Sentence Fluency=Day 3

    It is day three and the gang is bored. It is time for Voice. Looks like we already told you voice when Vito was yelling alot when he had his expression. If anybody knew what Sentence Fluency was it would be fat boy and Carlito. They told us that it would be our hat,shirt, and pants because they are sort of formed into sections. I hate fat boy. In a mall conventions would be like your money because if you had twenty thousand bucks, you wouldn't let people see it because they might want to steal it from you.

    Day 5

    It is the last day and now fat boy is eliminated for eating all the chicken wings. Only two guys left and they are Kelso and Carlito, and only one example left and that is Word Choice so it is coming up right now. In a mall Word Choice would be your shoes because your shoes always match and that is what your writing has to be like.

  Big Time-We only have ten minutes left so now it is question time and whoever gets this question right they will win all of these low riders.

    Question-Which show has Ashton Kutcher in it?

    A.That 70s Show

     B.TRL

    C.Yo Momma

    Carlito picked C and Kelso picked A so now the winner is KELSO. Kelso was amazed  and when he won he was making fun of Carlito. Two Years later Kelso became the richest man in the world and the three guys became losers.

                       So readers what kind of Story do you have for me?

                            

                        

Comments

[Bronwyn G]

That story was a bit cutthroat: almost like a certain comedy show you have been watching.

(Common Sense Media gave it a big condemnation, but I wouldn't stop you watching it if you enjoy it!)

I liked your turns of phrase and the way you have exciting things happen. What a great way to show the six traits and very original!

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